My Search For a Tribe

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I have to be straight forward and say I am not a fan of cliques. I don’t like it when I see a group of people who do not welcome someone new to their group.

I’ve never felt like I belonged to a certain group or clique.

Sometimes, I wonder if something is wrong with me. In high school, I would have a close friend here or there but never had a group. Same thing in college; I tried to join campus clubs but again, it resulted in a couple close friends. My college was more of a commuter school so joining a sorority wasn’t the same as a large university. Then at my first corporate job I just had a couple close friends. I really felt like something was wrong with me.

As I got older, I realized it is okay to not belong to a certain group. But what I think is not okay for me, is not having a support network.

What is that saying, “It takes a village to raise a child?” And it does. When I was working full-time outside the home with an infant, my support network was my family. My sister and in-laws were there to take care of our son. Now with two kids and working from home, my mommy friends are my support network.

This is so huge for me.

I am so used to doing things myself, but as of this past year, I have learned to lean on my mommy friends. So they are my tribe, my village. Not all these mommies are friends of one another, but they are my good friends. These women have such huge hearts and are always there for me, even when I know they have their own full plates.

I hate burdening another mom, but they don’t mind and I don’t mind them asking for my help. In fact, I am here for them whenever I am able to.

So my definition of a tribe is a group of your friends (whether they are friends with each other or not) who you can lean on and who you also offer to help.

It is hard for me to ask for help unless it is my last resort as I feel like it is a sign of weakness on my part, but I’ve realized it’s not. Admitting you need help is actually a strength. My tribe may be seasonal, and it may not be. One thing for sure, they are my family now.

So who is in your tribe?

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Shelly Holcomb
I grew up in Huntington Beach and moved out to go to Cal Poly Pomona where I got my undergraduate degree in Marketing. After working for a few years, I got my MBA at Pepperdine University. I have over 15 years of experience in marketing and sales. My husband and I live in Yorba Linda, and we have a 6 year old boy and a 19 month old baby girl. I enjoy spending time with my family, working out with my mommy friends and date nights with my hubby (whenever we can make it work). I'm excited to be a contributor to the Anaheim Moms Blog and share my thoughts and experiences with other moms. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6