The journey to our second child was long and unexpected.
This is a very emotional topic for me as it probably is for any other couples who have been down this road. It was not something I shared loosely with others while we were in the midst of it.
I never thought we would be a part of the statistics of unexplained secondary infertility. My husband and I got married in our early thirties and knew we wanted to start a family right away in case it may be difficult to conceive because of our age.
We were really surprised that I got pregnant after trying for one month. Our son was born healthy and safe even though I had an emergency c-section. The first year was rough being first time parents with a colicky baby who later became so energetic, but happy and healthy. On his first birthday, we were so thrilled to have survived the first year that we decided to wait on trying for a second child. Since we didn’t have any problems conceiving with our first we thought we had time to wait.
Our arrogance got the best of us.
We tried for almost two years naturally with no success. I started to panic, and think of all the “what ifs.” We prayed a lot. Then we turned to fertility help; however, all the diagnostic tests we took turned out fine.
Then we were labeled as unexplained secondary infertility.
I was so upset, what the hell was that? How could it be? My emotions were running wild; all the while I was still working full time with a toddler at home who could barely talk.
The first fertility clinic we worked with was a joke. We spent four months there and a lot of money. I don’t even want to go into the details of the heartache I felt with this doctor and the whole experience. Not to mention the hormonal roller coasters of pills and injections.
We continued to pray, and I started to focus on my health in general and also spent three months with acupuncture to help reduce the stress I was having. It was hard to hear from family asking when we were going to have a second baby and not go into details on why we couldn’t. I got to the point where I accepted the possibility that we were meant to be a one-child family. I was almost okay with that. But I felt the Lord had put that desire in my heart for a reason.
Months go by and my husband and I decided to seek fertility help again, but with another clinic. This clinic was totally opposite of the first one we went to. The doctor and staff were so compassionate and professional.
We started treatment right away and after our first round of IUI (Intrauterine Insemination), I was pregnant. We were so surprised and happy, yet scared at the same time. I took five pregnancy tests including a blood test and also an ultrasound before I truly believed this miracle. I had a healthy pregnancy and our baby girl was born healthy at 39 weeks.
This journey has taught us a lot. First and foremost, to trust the Lord with all our hearts because he has plans for us (Proverbs 3:5 and Jeremiah 29:11).
If you are currently going through infertility problems, know that you are not alone. Seek help where necessary, whether it is professional help or talking to a family member or friend. Thank you for letting me share this emotional experience.