Yesterday my husband did something fantastic for me. My one thing too many. My personal un-doable task. That may look different for different people, but for me it was my personal laundry. This might seem like a small silly thing, but for me it was huge. It was my one thing too many.
My one insurmountable task that kept me from moving forward.
You see, I struggle with my health – both mental and physical. I have fibromyalgia and I have anxiety issues. Right now is especially hard for me because the weather has turned cold and rainy which makes my chronic pain flare up, and the holidays make my anxiety amp up.
Let’s add in that I’m pregnant.
Just finishing my first trimester. So that exhaustion is multiplied by two or possibly more. I think personally babies are more than two times the amount of energy. This combo makes it seem as if the world is falling apart around me and I can do nothing about it.
I’m exhausted and have only been able to do the bare minimum of housework.
Some days that may look like just my daughter’s laundry, or just the dishes. Just getting her to school or picking up prescriptions. Meanwhile, my brain knows there is a lot more to do! I am a stay-at-home/work-from-home-part-time parent so to me it’s my job to do it.
The weight descends on my shoulders and I feel like I’m stuck in an ever deepening hole where now nothing is doable. I am frozen.
I’ll look around at the house – a huge mess – and my ever-growing personal pile of laundry and think, “I’ll never get any of this done,” and become even more stuck. My husband saw this pile growing and – while normally we do not do each others laundry – he started load after load of my personal laundry.
This man said nothing of the task. He just did it. And the weight lifted, I could see the light.
Suddenly, I had clean pants for the next day. My one task too many was off my plate, and the process had begun.
I was able to think about the other things.
I did the dishes. Hung up the Christmas decorations I had sitting around the house for days. I downloaded an app for organizing my chores so I could keep on top of it better. I called a house cleaner to help me with the heavy lifting. I even wrote this article (I may have been way past due, sorry editors). [Editor’s Note: It’s okay Liz we understand!]
And I cried.
With relief and appreciation, and quite possibly with pregnancy hormones. It felt like the sky had opened up and the sun was shining even though it was actually pouring rain outside.
I said to him, “How did you know? Thank you so so much.” My husband just smirked and said,
“You’ve been wearing the same pants for three days. This was clearly you’re one un-doable task.”
In movies and on TV, love is big romantic gestures of thousands of roses and getaways. In real life, the small things can count so much. Do that one thing too many for the person you love. You have no idea what it will mean to them.
It may even give them fresh start…and pants. It’ll definitely give them pants. Sometimes it literally is laundry that is the only thing standing in their way.